LYNN FRIESTH

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How to Develop Greater Emotional Intelligence

Lynn Friesth

Emotional intelligence can often seem fluffy. It can be hard to figure out what it means let alone how to develop the skill.


This is why I love the Beyond EI model. They get down to brass tacks when it comes to emotional intelligence and teach specific actions to take to become more effective. 


I recently had the opportunity to be on a panel where we talked about Beyond EI’s new masterclass and discussed emotional intelligence at length. We went into the various ways that emotional intelligence is misconstrued and clarified why it’s really about becoming remarkable and even more effective.


Last week on Creating Your Encore Career, I dove deeper into this topic and explained how emotional intelligence can help you become remarkable in your Encore Career.

 

The Original Model vs. Beyond EI’s Model

The traditional model of emotional intelligence has four domains:

  • Self-awareness

  • Self-management

  • Social awareness

  • Relationship management


Beyond EI’s model, on the other hand, moves into new arenas of emotional intelligence. They are as follows:

  • Awareness

  • Personal agency

  • Conscious sensemaking

  • Perceptual intelligence

 

Reframing

 

One of the major aspects of Beyond EI’s model is reframing our situations. 

 

When something happens to or around you, you have about six seconds to decide to look at it differently. 

 

First, you have to reframe your perception. Instead of seeing someone as your enemy, view them as a person who has a different opinion than you that you could consider listening to. 

 

Then, reframe your emotions. If you notice yourself tensing up, take some deep breaths or count to 10. Do whatever you can to calm your feelings of anger. 

 

Finally, reframe your response. Put a new meaning to what just happened so that your response will be calmer and more appropriate.

 

Self-Discoveries

 

Emotional intelligence also involves 12 self-discoveries posed as a series of 12 questions. Think through the following as you are trying to develop your own emotional intelligence:


  1. We are the common denominator

  2. Igniting your inner coach

  3. Senses + perception = your reality

  4. What do we have influence over?

  5. You don't have to believe everything you think

  6. For better or worse, your focus becomes your reality

  7. What are you building evidence for?

  8. Deficit-based bias

  9. Seeing the best in self and others

  10. Emptying your head trash

  11. Mantras, metaphors, and maps

  12. Happiness is a state of mind 


Beyond EI - Masterclass


If you need more support and clarity around emotional intelligence, consider enrolling in the Beyond EI Masterclass.


In this six-week intensive EI coaching and training program, you’ll learn what it looks and feels like to embody emotional intelligence. The program is designed for you to examine existing habits and build new, more emotionally intelligent ones through a learning approach that combines one-on-one coaching sessions, masterclass sessions, online study, practice, and reflection. 


This powerful combination will help you: 

  • Form new habits that will help you embody emotional intelligence 

  • Learn to recognize your perceptions in order to shift your perspective 

  • Develop your Inner Coach, the source of wisdom from within 

  • Live in alignment with what you value most 

  • Work with the mental patterns that are keeping you stuck 

  • Exercise agency in key moments 

 

Sign up for the masterclass here: https://beyondei.inc/ei-masterclass/