Last week on Creating Your Encore Career I talked with Michele Nevarez. In our conversation, we discussed her recently published book, Beyond Emotional Intelligence: A Guide to Accessing Your Full Potential.
Michele and her organization Beyondei are committed to bringing emotional intelligence to life by transforming theory into meaningful action. Her book helps readers discover the hidden inner workings of their minds so they can break unhelpful habits and set themselves on the path to achieving their full potential.
Never Stop Learning
One of the first things Michele and I discussed was the importance of being a beginner. It’s crucial that each of us, especially those of us in our Encore Careers, have two mindsets.
You should hold one mindset of being an expert. This means you honor the expertise that you have.
On the other hand, you have to have the mindset of a beginner. There are new skills you never had to use in corporate America that you now have to learn in your Encore Career. Having that beginner mindset puts us in a place of innocence, curiosity, and openness to learn something new from a different perspective.
When you have a beginner’s mindset, you’ll realize at different points along your journey that you still have so much to learn. Keep being open and know that your learning process is never done. Be willing to share about the things you have expertise in while remembering that you’ll never fully arrive at a place of “mastery.”
Self-Discoveries and Habits of Action
Michele and I also touched on many of the teachings in her book and that she provides through her organization every day. The first is self-discoveries that we should each adopt. Here are two that Michele suggests starting with and focusing heavily on.
Ignite Your Inner Coach
This encapsulates the idea that we each inherently have within us the wisdom and wherewithal to bring about any change in our lives that we focus on and deem important enough to practice and apply again and again. Igniting your inner coach means tapping into that inner wisdom. In order to do that, we need to quiet the mind, center ourselves, and let go of the things that may be clouding our vision or getting in the way of how we think about ourselves. Then, we have to cultivate the opposite. We have to build evidence in the direction of what we want to believe about ourselves and what's helpful to believe about ourselves.
You Are the Common Denominator
This self-discovery is the idea that, ultimately, we are the source of our own perceptions, emotions, and responses. Most of us falsely believe that everything taking place is outside of us. This causes us to fall into the trap of believing “the enemy is out there” or the obstacle is external to ourselves. In reality, so much of how we make sense of the world and what happens to us happens within our own brain. We're the ones making sense of our perceptions. Therefore, we need to learn to take personal accountability and responsibility for our outcomes and our perceptions that lead to those outcomes.
Michele also shared two habits everyone in their Encore Career should start working on developing.
Microtechniques or contemplative practices: these practices increase our attention, awareness, compassion, or empathy and make a difference in our ability to show up as more emotionally intelligent people.
Journaling: this has a positive impact on our ability to develop introspection and self-awareness by helping us pay attention to things we would normally miss and habitually do without giving them much thought.
Don’t get overwhelmed with all of this; rather, start with one small thing, practice it consistently, and you’ll begin developing emotional intelligence that will eventually change your life.
